Curiosity Killed the Cat

The other day inside my house I had the curtains closed,
Whatever was I up to? I'm not willing to disclose!
I shut the doors and windows and used just electric light,
So that I could work on my project throughout the night.

Suddenly I heard a sound and span round in my chair,
There was a curious looking cat sitting inside my lair,
I was so angry, my eyes turned red, how dare it disturb me
When I was busy doing what other eyes shouldn't see?!

I can't remember after that, I was livid with the thing!
However I can safely say; it's no longer still breathing
So I strung its stinking, mangy corpse up in the hall,
With a sign that read "Let that be a lesson to you all!"

Old Dog New Tricks

As I am a magician I'm adept at hiding cards,
Then I make them reappear; It really isn't hard.

I moved on to animalia just the other day;
I had a dove inside my glove but it flew away.

I tried to hide white rabbits inside my magic hat,
Unfortunately they were found by Lucky, my black cat.

As for Lucky, that poor soul, he didn't quite escape,
I tried to cut him in two halves ... what a bloody fate!

I tried to save my guinea-pig from my magic Great-White's tank,
But before the shark got him - he gave up and he sank!

Last week I attempted to levitate my rat ...
It worked for a few moments ... until he went "kersplat!"

Now I am an aspiring escape artist you see,
The RSPCA did me for animal cruelty.